Even for a while
by MadHatter99
Summary: How long has it been since I last stood right next beside you? TezuFuji


Disclaimer: PoT not mine anyway.

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How long has it been since I last stood right next beside you?

It takes me three years to know you, to understand you, to respect you.

It takes me another three years to see the real you, your passion and ambition.

After six long years standing beside you. Six years of playing and challenging one another. Six years of friendship, ups and downs, and now, I can only watch you from the side? I wonder if this is jealousy, this feeling that I'm having as I see your pictures in this magazine.

Six long years and now the only way to see your face is from a sport magazine or television.

Is it jealousy?

Anger? But to what?

What is there to hate? To blame?

I choose to quit tennis a long time ago, ever since we graduate from high school. It is my decision not to follow your path but seeing you here, in this magazine, this dark feeling burns deep inside me. This unknown feeling created by a mix of anger, jealousy and a longing to see you.

Maybe I just miss the good old days when you and I share this special relationship. Where we share the same view and dreams. Where I have the privilege to stand beside you.

It could be jealousy.

Maybe I'm jealous of your popularity and success while I'm still stuck here, trying to finish my degree.

"_The rising star player, Tezuka Kunimitsu, is rumored to coming back to Japan before going off for another competition…"_

I wonder if you still remember me, "Tezuka."

------

"Hello?"

"Hei Fuji! Still remember me? It's Eiji."

Eiji.

I wonder how long has it been since I spoke to him. We haven't been in contact since he moved after we graduate middle school. Must be about Tezuka coming back here.

"Have you seen the news?"

See.

"Yes I have."

"He's coming back here. I can't believe this! I'm so excited. It's been forever since we last saw him. I wonder if he changed in any ways."

I doubt so. He still looks serious in any of the photo and pushing himself really hard, as usual.

"Yes me too."

"So I think Oishi is planning some reunion at some place. Are you available at any time next week?"

I also wonder what happens to Oishi. It seems so long since we all meet up.

"I think so. My projects are due soon but I think I can make it."

"Great! I give you my number so you could contact me. Its xxx-ooo…."

Reunion. Great.

At least, I could meet him again.

------

I've been asking people about this dark, ugly feeling.

Some said its jealousy, which is not helping at all. Useless people.

Some said its love, which is more stupid since I can't possibly love him. I'm a guy and he's a guy. Even though I really want to see him, it does not mean I love him. I just want to see him and maybe, for the last time, stand beside him, but it does not mean I love him.

I respect him, a lot. Watching him doing his hardest, it inspires me.

Maybe it is more than respect, but it is certainly less than love.

I should leave this feeling of mine alone. Over time, it will probably go away.

------

"Wuaa Fuji-senpai! Long time no see. You haven't change at all! Still short as usual."

And so is you Momoshiro, with your big mouth.

"Here, sit here." "The main guest hasn't arrived yet."

This is not much of a reunion. There are only Oishi, Eiji and Momo. I wonder what happens to the other?

"Too bad Ryoma is still in America. Seems like he's busy training before the competition."

"Still competitive as ever."

"How about the others?"

"Kaidoh is busy with his work while Inui is doing some strange experiment for his project."

"Kawamura is busy with his shops so he couldn't make it. He sends his regards to everyone though."

I guess they don't change much. I hope Inui won't kill anyone with his experiment. I do miss the taste of his weird juice although I don't remember much about it anymore. It truly has been a long time since we are together like this. I wonder-

"Sorry I'm late."

…. That deep voice.

"TEZUKA!!!!"

"Wow! How long has it been? 2 years? 3 even?"

"You truly change. Seems like the oversea is good for you."

True. He has grown taller and darker. More masculine and his shoulders are broader than I last remember.

"You look different from the photos that I've seen."

"Is that so?"

His hand is still the same though, still as strong as ever as he grabs the chair and sits beside me.

"Is this it?"

"Unfortunately this is it. Everyone else are busy with their works though they all sends their regards to you and wish you luck for the next competition."

"How long are you staying here?"

Hopefully more than a week.

"5 days. Leaving on Monday morning."

Wishful thinking.

"That's all? After so many years?"

"Sorry I can't stay any longer than that. Getting that 5 days is already hard."

"I guess our ex-captain is really busy."

"So what have you been doing?"

"Well I'm finishing my med at xx university. I only need another two or three years before I graduate. Hopefully."

"I'm teaching sports now at oo elementary school."

"Momo?"

"I'm working now at this store. Trying to find some other, better, job though hahaha."

"How about you Fuji?"

"Huh.. ooo. Well I'm trying to finish my art degree at ooxx university. I'm almost there."

"Is that so."

I guess we all have our own path to walk now.

------

"Then hopefully I can see you again before you leave. Here's my number Tezuka."

"Thanks Oishi. Take care."

"Then I'm going too. Bye-bye captain, Fuji-senpai, Oishi-senpai, and Eiji-senpai."

"See you guys. Let's meet up sometimes again."

"Umm until then."

Is this it? Will this be the end after 3 years?

"I guess it's only the two of us now huh, Tezuka. Which way are you going?"

"Station."

"The same as me then."

At least I can stand and walk beside him for the last time.

"I heard you are living alone now."

"Yup. I rent this apartment since there isn't much space and privacy at home."

"I see."

Ne, Tezuka. I wish…

"How is your family?"

"Same as usual. Healthy."

"That's good."

I wish…

"You haven't change Fuji."

"Huh? Haven't I? I thought I changed at least a bit after all these years."

I wish you could stay longer.

I wish this moment could be longer.

"I guess this is it. I see you then."

"Do you want to go to my apartment?"

… Did I just ask that?

"No, I mean, since it has been a long time since we chat so why don't we go there and have some warm drinks. Its cold outside." "Its not that far."

I sound so desperate.

"Why not. It has been awhile."

------

Is it love?

It cannot be love.

To my knowledge, I've been straight and so he is.

This feeling is only a powerful longing feeling. It is not love, just a feeling of missing someone, someone that I really like and respect as a friend.

Yes, as a friend. No more than that. He is just my friend, my best friend who understands me the most.

So I wonder what is this warm feeling in my chest when he stands near me?

What is this shy feeling when he looks at me? When he says my name? When he touches my face so softly?

This feeling of mine is indescribable. I have been with him, beside him for six years and I never feel this way. The way he looks at me with his piercing eyes and the way his lips touches mine, gently and warm.

I think I just been kissed by my best friend that I know for more than six years, who is a guy, who is the current star player in tennis, and I think, it is love.

Maybe.

Not sure yet.

I do like this warm feeling of being touch by him and kiss by him. When he whispers my name, I smile so warmly, asking for more. I feel privilege, able to stay beside him and being loved by him.

Maybe it is not love, just simple jealousy for those people who are able to stay near him while I can't.

Or maybe it is love. Although if it is love, how long could this go on? It could last only for one night, five days, a month, a year or two? I could use my saving to go and see him for a while there, but it will not last forever.

Maybe love, maybe not. Whatever it is, I want to enjoy this feeling as long as I can.

This warm, loving feeling that I have when he kisses my lip, when he hugs me with his warm hands, when he whispers my name, and many more.

How long has it been since I stand right next beside you?

And now, after six years of knowing you and three years of watching you from far, you are here, right next beside me.

Even if it is only for a while.

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Finish.

Hope you like it. I haven't made any story for ages. My Tezufuji obsession is going down especially since the manga is finish now.

At first I was thinking of making a manga with story like this but I'm a lazy person so that doesn't happen hahahaha.

Anyway hope you like it and there probably will be some grammar error. I try to proof read it but yeah.


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